E66: Accountability is a Mindset not a Consequence

Have you ever faced the mirror and realized the person staring back needs to evolve to chase those lofty dreams? That's the moment I knew I had to rewire my mindset and actions around accountability, and it's what I'll be sharing with you, Coach Chef Kim, in this thought-provoking session. It's not just about the hustle for entrepreneurs and solopreneurs; it's about aligning life with aspirations through tough, transformative decisions. I'll pull back the curtain on my own journey of becoming selective about my network and who I allow into my space, all in the name of moving towards my dreams. It’s an honest discussion that’s bound to stir your soul and have you questioning who you need to evolve into for the sake of your ambitions.

In an age where self-love can often feel like a buzzword, I dissect its true meaning through the lens of accountability, a trait that's critical in avoiding the pitfalls of people-pleasing. We'll explore practical strategies like block scheduling that affirm a commitment to self-improvement, and why treating yourself with the compassion of a best friend is non-negotiable. Celebrate with me as we look back at the triumphs of the Emergence program's pioneers and eagerly anticipate the next level, designed to obliterate limiting beliefs. If you're ready to embrace a transformative and genuine journey to personal empowerment, let's embark on this adventure together, where accountability is the compass guiding us to a more authentic existence.

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Accountability as a Mindset and Action

Speaker 1 0:01

Hey friends , welcome back to another episode of the Positive Voice Podcast . I am your host , I am Coach Chef Kim , and I'm so , so , so excited that you have decided to tune in and to join me . Hey , can you do me a favor ? If you love listening to this podcast , can you share it with a friend or two , share it with a girlfriend , share it with your boyfriend , share it with your mama , your daddy , your pastor , your best friend ? I don't really care . Here's the deal , guys . I would love to take these podcast numbers to the next level , and the only way I can do that is by you sharing the information with other people . So I'm just asking , you know , if you don't mind , just go ahead and hit that share button and send this off to somebody else , because today's conversation we are going to talk about accountability . I know , I know , today we're going to talk about accountability , and here's why as an entrepreneurial wellness coach , what does that mean ? It means I help entrepreneurs in a holistic way . That's what it means .

Speaker 1 0:56

One of the things that I started to like wrestle with was the idea of accountability . Right , when you're an entrepreneur , particularly when you're a solopreneur , who are you holding yourself accountable to ? Um , a lot of people have issues with holding themselves accountable for things , right ? Um , it's one thing . For you to break a commitment to someone else is something totally different to break a commitment to yourself , and I don't think that we actually think about accountability in a way that is helpful and not hurtful . And so I want to just take a little bit of time and have that conversation with you and hopefully it might start some dialogue around it . I would love for you to you know , shoot me an email , holler at me Kimberly at CoachChefKimcom , and let's have a conversation around this , because I think that once we get through today's podcast , you might view how you move in life as an entrepreneur a little bit differently . So here's my thought . My thought is that accountability is a mindset first and then it is an action is a mindset first and then it is an action . A lot of people present accountability as a consequence . I'm going to hold you accountable for your behavior . I'm going to hold you accountable for not doing something . I'm going to hold you accountable for something negative which is going to yield us a consequence that is not helpful and is probably hurtful or harmful , right , but if we think about accountability with the idea that accountability is a mindset . That means having personal accountability is easy If you make a decision that you want to become a particular type of person . So we'll just use , for example , in my 90 day emergence coaching program .

Speaker 1 2:56

One of the things that I asked him this week was who do you need to become in order to have the life you were trying to manifest ? Oftentimes we are trying to manifest things and we are not the version of ourselves we need to be to handle it . If you were already that version of yourself , you'd already have it right . So if you don't have it and you're aspiring to have certain things , you're aspiring to be a certain type of person . Who do you need to become in order to do that ? How do you need to grow up ? How do you need to mature ? What skills do you need to focus on in order for you to be able to be the person who lives the life that you are trying to manifest ? So personal accountability takes that into consideration .

Speaker 1 3:49

So for me , there are some things that I have very big dreams and there are some things that I know . In order for me to have these things , there are certain people who need to be in my life . There is a certain team that needs to be built . There are people that I need to hire that I'm not training Right . There's a time and a place for that , and I have reached a place in business in this particular transition , in this season of my life where I don't really have time to train people who want to work with me , like that time of my life has passed . Right now , I need people who already have skill sets that can immediately be put to use . Notice , I said I needed to hire people who have skill sets that can be put to use , not that I was going to take another class to learn how to do something else . I know how to do a whole lot of things and there are some things I just need to delegate to other people so that I can become the highest version of myself . The highest version of myself is not a one woman show . This is not . I'm every woman . I'm aware of superhero cape and I can do it all I don't want to do . That loves .

Speaker 1 5:02

My rich life includes me being able to sleep eight to ten hours a night . It includes me not answering emails all the time . It includes me having a personal assistant as well as an executive assistant who do two different things . One of them is with me all the time and she has my cell phone , not me , right , my executive assistant is handling all the things inside of my multi-million dollar corporation . She is holding down the fort when I'm not in the building , and so my highest level self I know that that's where we're going , and in order for me to become that version of me that I'm manifesting , in order to have that lifestyle , there are some things that I have to do right now .

Speaker 1 5:41

So , right now , I 100% actively changing my network . I'm changing my network . There are other people that I need to invite into my life in order to help me go to the next level . Right , so I'm changing my network . I'm also adjusting who has access to me . Very recently it wasn't on purpose , but very recently my phone number changed and I didn't just like send out a mass text saying , hey , I have a new number . I didn't do that , and not only did my number change , the kids numbers changed , so a lot of people cannot get in touch with me anymore . That okay , it's okay , not for everybody , but for some people . That's okay , right , like everyone doesn't need access to you , and so , while this wasn't something I was trying to do , uh , it's just falling right in line with the way things are going right . And so what I'm trying to convey is the quality of the choices that you're making determine the quality of your life .

Speaker 1 6:48

Personal accountability is when you are actively looking at the choices that you are making , right , like I tell people all the time it's not your fault that some things have happened to you , right , like that is not your fault . There are a lot of things that have happened to you in your life that are not your fault , but it is your responsibility to heal from it and to make better decisions . So , while it's not your fault that some crazy things have happened to you , you cannot live in victim mode if you are trying to manifest the life of your dreams . It just doesn't work like that . I that , I'm sorry , right . So if we understand the quality of our choices determine the quality of our life , and we understand that accountability is a mindset , personal accountability is a mindset that is followed by an action . That is when you do things like if you're following me on social media right now , I am showing you my process of starting to block schedule .

Speaker 1 7:54

For two weeks we had a major change in our household , and for two weeks my schedule has been off and I've used that as an excuse not to show up for myself in the way I would normally show up for myself , and two weeks is a long time for me to have a pity party for myself , right ? And so then I went on a trip with a friend of mine and while I was driving I was like girl , get your life together . Like you are manifesting so many things , so many doors are being open . You are transitioning . You know we've many doors are being opened . You are transitioning . We've got new books coming out , there's new coaching programs coming out . All sorts of things are popping off .

Speaker 1 8:33

And I'm now using the excuse that , because we had a schedule change , I am unable to work during certain times . I had to CCK myself , I had to get myself together , and after I gathered myself I decided okay , what's the next best thing ? Once you're like I've had enough of me , I'm sick of my own ish . What is the next best thing to do ? I've had enough of me , I'm sick of my own ish . What is the next best thing to do ? And the next best thing for me was to figure out that if I know that I have this block of time that no longer belongs to me in the way that it used to , then how do I adjust the rest of my day ? It's only three hours there's 24 hours in a day so , kimberly , how do you adjust it ? So I moved to a block schedule and on the first day of my block scheduling it was fine . I didn't really stay on the schedule , but it was okay . I was still determined .

Speaker 1 9:23

On day two was when I realized I needed to adjust the entire thing . I needed to throw the whole thing out , because once again , life happens . So a consistent thing in our schedule changed on day two of my schedule and instead of , you know , throwing a pity party and getting an attitude about it , I literally just printed off another block schedule and started over . And then I created a schedule that made sense , based on the schedule changes . We already had . The new schedule change that popped off and then I left room in the case something else happened right , so I had to come up with new ways that I am now having to adjust .

Speaker 1 10:06

I haven't run off a block schedule in a really long time . We used to do this when my kids were much younger when we were homeschooling , um . But this block schedule is for me . It's's not for the kids and it's for me to be able to show up for myself and in my business in ways that I never have . And I'm looking at this schedule right now and I ended up having to literally schedule in a morning routine and gym and me , you know , drinking my water . There's a 30 minute period of intention setting at the start of every single day . That is on my block schedule .

Speaker 1 10:44

I gave myself buffer time . There are specific times in my day now where I check email , um , where you know if I need to take a nap . I take a nap like I just I gave myself down time throughout the day , and the reason I had to take a nap I take a nap Like I , just I gave myself downtime throughout the day . And the reason I had to do that is because my highest level self , the version of me that I'm becoming she is not running around like a chicken with her head cut off . She's very well put together , she's very well rested , she's hydrated , she drinks her water and minds her business right . She's closing seven figure deals all the time , like she's living her best life , and in order for me to be able to handle that , that means I must actively start doing things right now . That sets me up for that lifestyle later , and so for me , that started with a block schedule this week .

Speaker 1 11:37

So I had to hold myself accountable , and in a way that I'm holding myself accountable , it is by making sure that I do things that's on my calendar . So one of the things that I had to look at was what things am I doing that serve me and what things am I doing that don't serve me and I need to adjust . One of those things was my podcast . My podcast serves me . I love it . I love when you guys respond to it . I love when you guys tell me that you are binge listening to it and how it is helping you and it is changing your life . I love everything about that . So that means I'm not going to stop podcasting .

Speaker 1 12:12

What I do not love is the demand of putting out two podcasts a week in this moment , in this particular season of my life . That no longer supports me . My life is very busy right now , and so I have had to schedule in . I have two blocks that are two hours , tapped off for creating podcast content , and then we're going to schedule those out , right ? So every week I cannot sit down and do a podcast episode , but I have it on my block schedule for this week . So I'm pre-recording things so that my team can be able to grab them and have those promo materials ready to go on the days that things are being released

Embracing Accountability and Self-Love

Speaker 1 12:53

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Speaker 1 12:53

And so it doesn't mean that you're going to get rid of everything as you start to evaluate your life . It just means that you need to look at what things can I do and what can I do . You're in control of your schedule , right , and accountability means well , I can do this , but I can't do that , and you have to be okay with that . Right , do not overextend yourself , do not overbook yourself . Do not turn into a people pleaser and feel like you must show up for other people , or else they're not gonna love you . Guess what , sweetie , even if you don't show up for them , whether you show up or not , their feelings for you are gonna be the same , and whether they love you or they don't , it doesn't matter , okay , all right , so we're looking at accountability as a mindset . Just literally make up your mind that the , the promises that you make to yourself are important .

Speaker 1 13:44

We always put ourselves last . Putting yourself last honestly is a disservice to yourself and it on . If you think about it this way , if you look at yourself as your best friend , if you put your best friend last , if you did everything for everybody else and your best friend got the leftovers , if you were outside running around doing all sorts of things and your best friend who has been waiting for you , who has been here for you day in and day out , because you are with yourself 24-7 . If you were to ignore your best friend , who has been supporting you from the start , who has been here for every up and down , just because somebody else called and said they needed you to come help them further themselves . If you did that to your real life best friend , I don't know that your best friend would stay your best friend . So why are you doing that to yourself ? If you view yourself as your first best friend , I promise you you will show up differently for yourself .

Speaker 1 14:51

All right , and that's what accountability is . It's understanding that it is a mindset and then it is an action . If you take on the mindset that I am my first best friend and that any promise that I make to myself , ie me doing block scheduling . If I put something on this schedule that I need to sit down and do it at this time , that's what I'm going to do . That means my phone is on , do not disturb . It means I cannot take any conference calls , I cannot hop on the phone with you , I cannot Netflix and chill with you . I am committed to doing this thing for the future version of myself . Right . Then the action follows that . When you stay committed to yourself , then you actually do the action . When you do the action , the action then allows you to position yourself properly to manifest the things you want . It really is a simple process , but the biggest piece to it is the accountability . All of that to say , I really hope that you understand that by looking at accountability as a mindset and then an action and not a consequence , it will be easier for you to be able to adapt and overcome in trying situations right .

Speaker 1 16:11

Something that I heard today at an event was um , the person who walks with wise people becomes wiser . Your community matters , the people who you are confiding into . They matter the people who you are confiding into . They matter the people who you share your hopes and dreams with . They matter because either they're supporting you , which gives you that dopamine hit and an extra boost of energy to keep going , or they are not supporting you and they are a hindrance to your growth and your process . And they are a hindrance to your growth and your process right . And so that means for you , you must surround yourself by people who have your best interests at heart , people who , when they deal with you , are placing your needs , wants , desires and aspirations in front of their own . The same way , you will drop things for other people if you don't have people in your life who will drop things for you . I need you to start building a new circle .

Speaker 1 17:24

One of the things that I absolutely love about being an entrepreneurial wellness coach is my 90-day coaching program . When I launched Emergence back in January , it was only supposed to be for 90 days . That was it . I was going to come in , change your life and keep it pushing . We are almost at the end of our first 90 day cohort . Cohort one has been an absolute dream . I don't know if I could have asked for a better cohort to launch the emergence program with , and what I discovered was that , even though I taught a whole lot of tools . We now needed some practical application .

Speaker 1 18:11

And so now there is an emergence level two and the people who are in cohort one love cohort one so much that they're like , okay , can we immediately move into level two ? And I was like , y'all , it's going to start in June . They're like , no , thank you , we needed to start the next week . And so we came to a decision that level two , which would be practical applications of all the things they've learned over the last 90 days , um , we're doing the hard thing in level two . That program will start the last Tuesday of April and it warms my heart to think about the fact that people want to continue to change their mindset , that once you work through your limiting beliefs , once you expose what systems and thought patterns are not yours that have been holding you back and hindering you , once you expose these things and bring things to light , once you're able to start choosing a new thought and choosing a new direction for yourself , once you're able to start dreaming bigger , which are all things we did in cohort one of level one , um , I am excited to prepare for cohort two of level one , which will start May 15th .

Speaker 1 19:31

So if you are someone who is looking for a community of like minded entrepreneurs . You all are all on the same page . You are ready to work through your limiting beliefs . Essentially , as I said with the first group , you sick of your own shit , right ? If you have reached that point in your journey where you're like like I've had enough and I really just need to like get this together , then I would love to invite you . May 15th we are going to kick off um , the first part of the emergence experience , level one . It will hit the ground running on j 1st , but we're going to start May 15th because I need to have a one-on-one session with all members of the cohort before we begin for cohort two . So if you are looking for that , I just want you to know that that is available to you . I will definitely have the link down below in the show notes If you want to take a look at it . No one can join level two without completing level one . It just doesn't work like that . So you can definitely take a look at what the first 90 days looks like and then what the second 90 days of the process will look like , but it's something that you really must think about and you must be committed to . Right Again , we talk about accountability .

Speaker 1 20:50

As a mindset coach , it's not my job to make you do things . It is my job to walk alongside of you as you are on your journey , and so you must be able to understand that accountability is a mindset . It is not a consequence for you not doing something . Accountability is a mindset that is followed by an action , and here's an action I have for you as I bring this podcast to a close . I want you to complete the following affirmation I am , and then insert thing here I can . Insert thing I will insert thing . Do the I am , I can , I will . Affirmation process , and if you want to come talk to me about it on Instagram , please do so underneath the podcast post for this week , until next time . I will talk to you soon .